On Relationship

One of my closest female pal just broke up with her boyfriend recently and she was deeply devastated in seeing the three years they spent together flushed down the drain.

I’m no expert on relationship but based on my observation, the following are the main causes of break up:

*Third Party: Let’s face it; guys are very visual and sensual. We are easily distracted by beautiful and flirty women. Primordial pulses always make its way to the thingee between our legs and before you know it…you know what I mean.

Though, morally speaking, sex is very sacred, a normal guy pretty knows that sometimes, it’s just a release of carnal feelings. Guys can totally separate love and lust, unlike women [I presume].

A given opportunity, even within the bounds of valid relationship, can transform a decent man into Patrolman Jerk. This natural characteristic, however, is not a means to an end and finding a guy who can control such urges, should an opportunity arise, is pretty hard to find these days and ladies, should you find one…keep him for good!

*Emotional Dependence: It’s a fact; women are far more emotional than men [but if he is a cry baby… hmmm, you need to evaluate his actions, you might discover you’re on the same wavelength and his hair needs a highlight as well]

Anyhow, being too emotionally attached to your partner is a definite no no! Do not make your partner as your sole reservoir of happiness, your exclusive well of personal fulfillment and your solitary pillar of strength.

I’m not saying that these feelings of attachment are wrong, however, we must always consider that like us, they are human as well, who, at one time or another, crumbles and fall between personal battles.

To the ladies, most men are not the knight in the shining armor. You need to discover your own strength. By finding your own self first, you need not look for affirmation or validation that you are worthy…because YOU ARE.

*Unfounded Love: The first stages of courting are the most sensual part. We can literally see rainbows and butterflies and the fourth of July being played over and over again, and to tell you honestly, I look forward to this particular stage. It’s fun and the adrenaline rush is at an all time high.

But when the feelings are dwindling down *poof* we hop to another relationship trying to figure out how to replay that familiar sensation over…and over again. Well, for crying out loud, it’s only in Hollywood that the courting stage never stops. In the real world, relationships evolved and true love keeps abreast to changes.

I have heard before [and I believe it is true] that in finding good relationship, do not go for the looks because physical attributes fade as time passes by. When physicality sheds off, what is left is the true self…and if he or she is numbnuts or a tool to begin with, then you are wasting your time to someone who is not worthy of your affection.

In retrospect, this is my cardinal virtue:

Do not enter into a serious romantic relationship if you are still searching for your own self. Your partner cannot make you whole and neither can you. Being emotionally balance will help you to overcome the roller coaster ride. Finding happiness or fulfillment based solely on what your partner can give will only leave you empty handed and heartbroken.