ugh!

I’m definitely swamped with work this month. Our division implemented the six day working period and to top it of, we have to render additional three hours of overtime everyday. My personal life is definitely compromised as of this moment to accommodate the Herculean workload we have. Sure, sure...I will have a fat paycheck on the next round of payroll but to heck with that… I feel so drained already and all I can think of is quitting and leaving the company. And yeah, go to a movie house and unwind, which is a far fetch idea at this time…ugh!

This I believe is a job burnout!

If I never Knew You

This is a clip from the movie Pocahontas...eversince I have heard this song, I can't remember having a blank thought while this is playing. My mind wanders from the moment I first saw her and wished ....naaah! that's something I have to keep by myself. As John Smith said (paraphrasing) " It's better to die than not knowing that person...a 100 years is not a life at all". Okay, forgive me...I know that I can be a hopeless romantic sometimes...

**********

90/10

I have learned a long time ago that when a person has a low concept of God, he’s actions are primarily geared to self indulgence. That inkling that Someone has the power to throw you into the lake of fire or be willing to take you under His wings in paradise will change your perspective about what is important or what is not. You always view your actions in light of eternity.

*****

Why do guys are always attracted to a woman having an IQ of a carrot?

Last night at around 1 am and barely sleeping for an hour, a girl, quite tipsy and all that, (an evening acquaintance of one of my housemates) went inside our room and blubber incoherent insults to my roommate asking him to go downstairs with her and waste the night away. I was totally shocked of her mindless theatrics. She saw me sleeping and noticed that I was abruptly awakened by her charade and yet still had the nerve to laugh. To top it off she didn’t even apologize for her behavior. Oh! God forgive me for my horrible thoughts at that time. It took me a long time to gather my sleep nods again and I was thinking of gorging her eyes and pulling her tongue away to satisfy my sadistic desires to inflict suffering to her. I was so mad! Anyhow, I pondered that wasting my precious time arguing with a banal woman is not worth the effort. I’m accustomed to move away to seemingly good opportunities to let them taste my fury but I followed the 90-10 principle ever since. I have a 90% chance of controlling my actions and the 10% are mere coincidences and untoward circumstances that are far beyond my control. The following are the questions I am answering before prompting to erupt;

*Does it Matter? Most of those irritations are of minor significance and I just shrug my shoulder and consider it as a history.

* Is it worth my time? A minute of unhappiness is still a minute lost. There are more problems of higher weights that needed to be focused on.

* Will I be satisfied after? Apparently for only a miniscule amount of time because after the bursting of the bubble, I have to face any repercussions or words thats been said. I hate feeling guilty afterwards.

So, basically, people at one time or another will definitely annoy us. Bringing us to our animalistic predisposition…well, the choice of having a bad day or not always rest within us!

…just thinking aloud!

Charles in Charge

I watched "Charles in Charge" when I was still a kid and the stupid intro song stuck in my head ever since. Anyways, I found this on youtube...funny!

Don't Mess with Old Ladies

An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...

Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

Officer: Don't have one?

Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Older Woman: I can't do that.

Officer: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.

Don't Mess With Old Ladies

F***

I just cannot get guys who cannot construct a decent and coherent sentence without adding vulgarity on it. Its like “fuck” is a noun, verb, adverb and adjective all rolled into one. It irks the hell out of me because I have to decipher what on earth they were trying to convey. Maybe that word “fuck” means I’m angry, I’m pissed etc or that “fucking” person is a moron, stupid or whatever. Hmmm, it’s like a catch- all, fits all word that cannot be expressed with just a combination of a lower, more conservative tone of idea.

On the other hand, you could easily judge what that person consists of by the way he thinks or the words coming out from his mouth. If all he could muster was a deliberate mishmash of profanity and obscene word play….well, you know what I mean.

…just thinking aloud!

nothing much...

Overheard from the movie house I went yesterday

Old man: how much is "submerd"

Ticketing lady: You mean “submerged” ?

Old man: No, the one with Steven Segal on it…

Ticketing Lady: Yeah, the movie is called “submerged”

Old man: “submerd” with Steven….oh! yeah…

I wonder if how he is going to understand that film hehe!

**********

I watched Disney’s “8 Below” yesterday. A very poignant film about sled dogs whom a group of explorers led by Paul Walker, left in the middle of an Antarctic storm. The dogs survived for 6 months fending for themselves, eating a dead whale and albatross-like birds. An animal lover will surely love this film…that made me think about owning a Siberian husky someday…hmmmm!

**********

I love my feeling of independence, not that I’m socially inept or anything but there’s a satisfaction with just entertaining my own thoughts and the anticipation of reading a good book with a cup of coffee at night. I love to go out with my friends but sometimes, I opted to cancel our plans because I feel I am better off staying at home and do my personal stuffs like laundry etc.

Many people are somewhat freaked out when they find themselves being alone and all they could hear is the deafening silence of solitude but heck, I’d rather choose that one instead of the blaring sounds from a night in a bar.

**********

Just a quick joke:

Having just moved into his new office, a pompous, new colonel was sitting at his desk when an airman knocked on the door.

Conscious of his new position, the colonel quickly picked up the phone, told the airman to enter, then said into the phone, "Yes, General, I'll be seeing him this afternoon and I'll pass along your message. In the meantime, thank you for your good wishes, sir."

Feeling as though he had sufficiently impressed the young enlisted man, he asked, "What do you want?"

"Nothing important, sir," the airman replied, "just here to hook up your telephone."

The Difference Between Men and Women

Laugh out loud with this story...
************************************************

Let's say a guy named Roger is attracted to a woman named Elaine. He asks her out to dinner; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out again; and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else.

And then, one evening when they're driving home, a thought occurs to Elaine, and, without really thinking, she says it aloud: "Do you realize that, as of tonight, we've been seeing each other for exactly six months?"

And then there is silence in the car.

To Elaine, it seems like a very loud silence. She thinks to herself: I wonder if it bothers him that I said that. Maybe he's been feeling confined by our relationship; maybe he thinks I'm trying to push him into some kind of obligation that he doesn't want, or isn't sure of.

And Roger is thinking: Wow! Six months.

And Elaine is thinking: But, hey, I'm not so sure I want this kind of relationship, either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so I'd have time to think about whether I really want us to keep going the way we are, moving steadily toward... I mean, where are we going? Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know this person?

And Roger is thinking: So, that means it was... let's see... February when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer's, which means...let me check the odometer... Whoa! I am way overdue for an oil change here.

And Elaine is thinking: He's upset. I can see it on his face. Maybe I'm reading this completely wrong. Maybe he wants more from our relationship, more intimacy, more commitment; maybe he has sensed, even before I sensed it, that I was feeling some reservations. Yes, I bet that's it. That's why he's so reluctant to say anything about his own feelings. He's afraid of being rejected.

And Roger is thinking: And I'm going to have them look at the transmission again. I don't care what those morons say, it's still not shifting right. And they better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. What cold weather? It's 87 degrees and this thing is shifting like a garbage truck, and I paid those incompetent thieves $600.

And Elaine is thinking: He's angry. And I don't blame him. I'd be angry, too. I feel so guilty, putting him through this, but I can't help the way I feel.

I'm just not sure.

And Roger is thinking: They'll probably say it's only a 90-day warranty... idiots.

And Elaine is thinking: Maybe I'm just too idealistic, waiting for a knight to come riding up on his white horse, when I'm sitting right next to a perfectly good person, a person I enjoy being with, a person I truly do care about, a person who seems to truly care about me. A person who is in pain because of my self-centered, schoolgirl romantic fantasy.

And Roger is thinking: Warranty? They'd better not say its only a 90-day warranty.

"Roger," Elaine says aloud.

"What?" says Roger, startled.

"Please don't torture yourself like this," she says, her eyes beginning to brim with tears. "Maybe I should never have... Oh my, I feel so... (She breaks down, sobbing.)

"What?" says Roger.

"I'm such a fool," Elaine sobs. "I mean, I know there's no knight. I really know that. It's silly. There's no knight, and there's no horse."

"There's no horse?" says Roger.

"You think I'm a fool, don't you?" Elaine says.

"No!" says Roger, glad to finally know the correct answer.

"It's just that...it's that I...I need some time," Elaine says.

There is a 15-second pause while Roger, thinking as fast as he can, tries to come up with a safe response. Finally he comes up with one that he thinks might work. "Yes," he says.

Elaine, deeply moved, touches his hand. "Oh, Roger, do you really feel that way?" she says.

"What way?" says Roger.

"That way about time," says Elaine.

"Oh," says Roger. "Yes."

Elaine turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing him to become very nervous about what she might say next, especially if it involves a horse. At last she speaks.

"Thank you, Roger," she says.

"Thank you," says Roger.

Then he takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a conflicted, tortured soul, and weeps until dawn.

When Roger gets back to his place, he opens a bag of Doritos, turns on the TV, and immediately becomes deeply involved in a rerun of a tennis match between two Czechoslovakians he never heard of. A tiny voice in the far recesses of his mind tells him that something major was going on back there in the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would ever understand what, and so he figures it's better if he doesn't think about it.

The next day Elaine will call her closest friend, or perhaps two of them, and they will talk about this situation for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they will analyze everything she said and everything he said, going over it time and time again, exploring every word, expression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering every possible ramification. They will continue to discuss this subject, off and on, for weeks, maybe months, never reaching any definite conclusions, but never getting bored with it, either.

Meanwhile, Roger, while playing racquetball one day with a mutual friend of his and Elaine's, will pause just before serving, frown, and say, "Norm, did Elaine ever own a horse?"

And that's the difference between men and women.

Thank You Lord for the Gift of Salvation...

He Gave His Only Son

While most people are readying themselves going to the beach, it’s funny to note that the observance of the death of Christ was nothing more than a poor excuse to have some fun. Please take time to read this story and may the real reason of the cross be internalized as we celebrate the Holiest week of the Christian calendar.

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~There was once a big turntable bridge which spanned a large river. During most of the day, the bridge sat with the length running up and down the river parallel with the banks allowing ships to pass freely on both sides of the bridge. But, at certain times of the day, a certain train would come along and the bridge would be turned sideways across the river allowing the train to cross.

A switchman sat in a small shack on one side of the river where he operated the controls to turn the bridge and lock it into place when the train crossed. One evening when the switchman was waiting for the last train of the day to come, he looked off into the distance through the dimming twilight and caught sight of the train's light. He stepped to the controls and waited until the train was at a prescribed distance when he was to turn the bridge. He turned the bridge into position, but to his horror, he found that the locking control didn't work. If the bridge was not locked securely into position, it would wobble back and forth and the ends when the train came to it, causing the train to jump the track and go crashing into the river. This would be a passenger train with many people aboard.

He left the shack with the bridge turned across the river and hurried to the other side of the river where there was a lever which he could use to operate the lock manually. He could hear the rumble of the train now and leaned back-ward to apply his weight to it, locking the bridge. Many lives depended upon this man's strength.

Then, coming across the bridge from the other direction, he heard a sound that made his blood run cold. "Daddy, where are you?" His four-year-old son was crossing the bridge to look for him. His first instinct was to cry out to the child, "Run! Run!" But the train was too close. The tiny feet would never make it across the bridge in time. The man almost left the lever to run and snatch up his son and carry him to safety, but he realized he could not get back to the lever in time. Either the people on the train or his son must die. He took just a moment to make his decision.

The train sped swiftly and safely on its way and no one on board was even aware of the tiny, broken body thrown mercilessly into the river by the rushing train. Nor were they aware of the pitiful figure of a sobbing man still clinging tightly to the locking lever long after the train had passed. They didn't see him walking home more slowly than he had ever walked to tell his wife how he had sacrificed their son.

Now, if you can comprehend the emotions which went through this man's heart, you can begin to understand the feelings of our Heavenly Father when He sacrificed His Son to bridge the gap between us and eternal life. Can there be any wonder that He caused the earth to tremble and the skies to darken when His Son died? And how does it feel when we speed along life without giving a thought to what was done for us through Jesus Christ? When was the last time you thanked Him for the sacrifice of His Son?

two to tango

I had the chance to attend to one of my friend’s wedding yesterday and somehow, the what-if scenario flooded my mind again.

It feels good and so darn romantic witnessing two souls tie the knot. It seemed that the stars aligned just for one single moment and the heaven opened with the angels singing wedding songs.

But it made me think about the probability when I will be at the same altar uttering my eternal vow to that woman who will make my life complete. Would it be like what I imagined before or much better? What will be the exact feeling that I will experience during that time…knowing that the person that’s in front of me is the woman that I am going to share my life with.

Chances like this often come to remind us the bigger picture of our life. That we are to meet someone, fall in love and weave a life together. I know that it’s a Mother Goose arrangement to reckon that a married life is all but a smooth sailing adventure. Much likely it isn’t and will never be. Many divorces happened because they couple wants the temporary high--that particular euphoria of courting and falling in love. But honeymoon stage is just but a fleeting moment that can easily take its way out after the finances and marital issues come into surface.

Well, I just hope that I will be ready by then when the wedding bells rang and real life begins.

wishful thinking

Im barely hanging on! I’m swamped with work today and can’t even take a breather! *sigh*

On a great day like this, when the sun is shining and the sky so blue, oh man, how I wish I could press my feet on the sands as the waves gently kiss my knees… the wind then blow a silent whisper on my ear and I will close my eyes…gently submerging my body to let the waves carry me across the blue green ocean.

Reality check Jef, you’re at the office…deal with it OK!

Side note: Watch Ice Age 2. It’s really [insert wow, excellent, great,awesome] movie. I can’t remember the last time I’ve had a such good amount of laugh. The plot was extremely well structured and the characters were sooo unforgettable. Why can’t they make more clean, wholesome and more family oriented films, eh? Heck! They are the one which gather bucks at box office, remember Finding Nemo…

OK! The rant stops here, gotta go to work again…*sigh*

porn habit

To be spiritually clean you must not expose yourself from obvious filth and perversion right?

Funny to note that few of my housemates who are avowed Christians are cherishing and probably salivating with the porn collections that they have. A couple of days ago someone bought a TV set and that starts their “relaxing” habit.

As I was reading (As Summers Die by Winston Groom—great book by the way) inside my room, I could hear giggles and mild laughter from the other room. I was a bit curious but shoved my curiosity as I have suspected that they were watching trash…and yep they were! Totally engrossed watching two naked individuals doing things that were supposed to be done only in private. They asked me to join them but they didn’t insist when I say NO!

Not to sound so preachy, I admit that I viewed a couple of triple X’s with m y friends before, but I realized that it was pure lust in its rawest form…and whatever justification I could think of at that time, my conscience dictates that it was wrong. Simple as that!

After the viewing they have done, they still have the nerve to play Praise and Worship songs and it irks the hell out of me because c’mon, that is sooo hypocritical.

To guard ourselves from the atrocities of evil, lets not be counted as one who promoted or approved such.

…well just thinking outloud!

back to reality

After a two day hiatus from the daily gripe, I am here again working in front of the computer covering an 18 hour shift! Man, it’s hard to offset an absence and I can see the toll that’s been happening in my body. Truth is I feel weak and darn exhausted. I just came from the province (a very well spent vacation though) and the moment I step from the bus, all I can take heed was the rolling of my eyes saying “here we go again!”

*************

Funny that I am like a border now to my own home back in the province. Of course, I still have all my belongings back there but it feels different now. It’s like I’ve been away for so long that I need to reacquaint with the old memories I’ve been so familiar with.

*************

It’s great to be with my family again. We’ve been so tightly knitted that I cherished every single moments with them. I’m just so pissed that every now and then I was counting the remaining hours before I will depart and go back to reality—my reality! But. It feels good to chuckle and wrestle with my young bro and talk frivolously with the parentals. I had the chance to play with my cat for 8 years and guess what, he still recognizes me and can’t seem to get enough that I was there again. Too bad, I was just passing by.

*************

With my head spinning at this moment and my blood basically turning white with anemia hehe, I take all the consequences of my unplanned absence in the office because I had a blast going down and finding my own source of happiness. My family.