...and the saga continues

This week has been one of the most stressful week EVER. Lots of things to do at work with a minimum time to take a personal breather--blogging for instance.

By the way, I applied via online to a certain telecom solutions provider for a position that involves SAP technology and luckily I was called in for an interview last Friday.

From the headhunter’s mouth, he said that :

1. I'm intimidating

2. He really doesn't know me (duh! isn't that TOO obvious)

3. I'm borderline gay (ugh)

Ok, ok, you should know that I just met this guy and I have no right to assess him whatsoever but I kinda laugh when he said:

“Do you consider yourself as straight?"

To which my blabbing mouth replied:

“As of now I think...WHO KNOWS?"

I meant this as a joke but I think he took it seriously.

"So you mean to say there will be a chance that you will go the other way..." I think I saw his eyes saying yipeee! (behave Jef)

“No Sir, I'm straight as an arrow!" ---gasping---

Oh! Well, I managed to segue our conversation into a much relevant topic of interest. I do have qualms whether I will be hired or not. Dami kasing matatalinong kasabayan! But just to be picked for an interview amidst the thousands of hopefuls is a triumph in itself.

On that note, starting with this post, I would like to present you my Random Quote taken from the vast universe of the place we all love—the internet.

Is it ignorance or apathy? Hey, I don't know and I don't care—Jimmy Buffet

Have a great weekend guys!

When work interrupts blogging life...

the effect is a crude by-product of stressed out life


I really would like to update but I'm running around with bad ideas...and my work sucked all my creative juices (if I have one.)

Ugh! Updates soon.

It's just that my mind is wandering and sometimes leaving off completely.

On Failure

Exactly a year ago, the result of the CPA Board exam which I took was finally posted on the different review centers.

I failed. Bummer.

...I believe I already wrote my sentiments in this blog from which I quote:

" I believe my passing of the board will be a good parting gift to my aging parents. They are the main reason why I pushed myself to the limit and muster the remaining strength to finish the race so to speak. And life did go on…but something deep inside me withered and died."

And I continue:

"That was the first time I discovered also that I am not holding my destiny after all and it’s an utter arrogance to say the least, that I am the master of my faith…the captain of my soul. And even if how hard you work, sometimes those things or events that you want most cannot be materialized because simply, it wasn’t meant to be.

Though, all these ephemeral disappointments come and go, what I’ve learned most about all these series of events was this absolute truth: family will always be there.

I’m still learning to accept my reality as it is but I don’t plan my life now with a matter-of-fact approach…instead I carve my dreams and wishes nowadays across the walls of my heart and buff it with a simple prayer that His will shall be done."

I still plan to take the board for the LAST time and let's just see. Failure is just a temporary setback. It's not the end result or culmination of an endeavor. As the great Abe Lincoln once coined, " It was just a slip... not a fall."


A friend texted me this message a couple of days ago--talk about coincidence--and thanks to her, my pity party came to a hault.

In my existence, I realized that happiness is a very subjective factor in ones life...being happy doesn’t depend on achieving what you want, but rather making the best out of what is given. Life isn't fair, it never was. The only thing that can make you completely happy is CONTENTMENT...be content on what you have, but be sure to aim high and never stop believing you can do better every time. But if all else fails, don't forget than an ordinary you has an extraordinary God to back you up!

To you my dear friends who took time to read all the sappiness I have to offer, please forgive me if sometimes, all my thoughts are just random pinches of emotion. Yes! You are right...I should be given a restraining order because I should be in a mental asylum***kidding*** but when I started posting my thoughts, my main motivation was to inspire and if I did (even in a very remote possibility) then I have accomplished to what I believe I am here for.

Have a great Weekend, Guys!

Weekend Musing

Due to his diabetes and high blood pressure, which by the way are already stabilized, one of the stings this disease had left was my Dad's poor eyesight—his vision was deeply affected. He can barely see nowadays and it breaks my heart to realize that his main window to the world is slowly dimming. I cannot even fathom how crippling his situation is. Just imagine yourself being led to a darker world--a world lacking from light, colors and shapes; a world void of beauty.

From a person like my Dad with no habits whatsoever, this is more likely an unfair situation. But ranting about the unfairness of life won’t help. Heck, who said by the way that life is fair. These are just but one of life’s little mysteries that will be unfolded later.

As a son comforting his Dad, words do escape me. My two cents seem so futile…I believe, however, that in any given situation, you must focus on the positive aspect. Although he suffered from a stroke, he was not left an invalid. He can still navigate his way in our home, do whatever it is within his capacity and be able to socialize with people.

But keeping a positive outlook is a feat in itself. This is more of a mental battle than an emotional one. It takes a lot of sheer faith to believe that in every difficulty, a triumph will also ensue.

And as a family, what keeps us intact and what keeps us going amidst the difficulties and problems is by looking up.

In the dark hour of the soul, we must not forget what we've learned in the light.

God has proven his grace and faithfulness innumerable times.

I am confident that He is still in control.

***********

I asked God for strength, that I might achieve,

I was made weak, that I might learn humbly to obey.

I asked for health, that I might do greater things,

I was given infirmity, that I might do better things.

I asked for riches, that I might be happy,

I was given poverty, that I might be wise.

I asked for power, that I might have the praise of men,

I was given weakness, that I might feel the need of God.

I asked for all things, that I might enjoy life,

I was given life, that I might enjoy all things.

I got nothing I asked for –

but everything I had hoped for.

Almost, inspite myself, my

unspoken prayers were answered.

I am, among all men,

most richly blessed.

Anonymous Confederate Soldier

***********

A blessed week ahead.

Random Thoughts

~ I once asked a saleslady at a major department store where the ForEx (Foreign Exchange) is located and she was all smile to reply “Sir! Is that a new brand of shirt?"

~ Though it is acceptable fact that officemates come and go, when they file for a resignation, I still can't help but to feel sad (however annoying they are.) They somehow made their way from my ass all the way to my heart **wink wink***

~ Last song syndrome sucks. I make it sure that when I leave the house, the last song that I will hear will not turn into an earworm. It's pretty bad whistling about a panty liner or singing unconsciously about a detergent bar while riding in a public vehicle.

~ Every time I went peepee in the mall, I always find a close cubicle or otherwise wait for someone else to get out. I never, and I mean NEVER, will be standing again beside some nondescript guy when I am heeding Mother Nature’s call. Why? Well, I once saw another man's wanger accidentally ***shudder**** and it took me days to remove it from my memory.

~ It’s true, we always think that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, but we fail to realize that maybe the water bill is much, much higher also.

~ In the recent typhoon we had, I never read militant groups (or student activists for that matter) helped out to clean up the mess. Whhhhhhhyyyyy! Because they only want their esophagus to work than have their hands get dirty.

~ The very popular varsity players of our school before are now packing grocery items in our nearby mall. Hmmm...Life’s little surprises.

Insight

I went out with friends a few days ago and we went to a popular bar. Sure, it was great to hangout with ‘cool’ people and the band that was playing at that time was really good.

But apart from the thumping music and booze, I felt like running away from that place. I have never felt so alone in my life before.

But then, from the glass window, I saw a kid standing in front of me.

He smiled and I smiled back.

…through his eyes I saw a youngster who enjoys solitude while treading a grassy clearing. A kid who weaves his own dreams across the vast purple sky; a kid who cherished the dancing of the dragonflies, of colorful clouds during dusk and of witnessing little miracles.

He was not afraid to be alone, to take pleasure in simple things and to deeply appreciate quiet moments.

I went outside to look for him.

That’s when I realized that the kid was…me.

Your problems aren't that original-Dawson's Creek

Budz, Luvs and Iya

I had the opportunity to accompany my sister-in-law to the airport bound to Dubai yesterday. She's the wife of my eldest brother. She happened to secure a two week vacation leave to attend the first birthday of their firstborn child, Iya.

Their courting stretched to an unbelievable eight year period. They were separated half the time they were engaged. My brother was already working abroad at that time and yet they managed to stay together despite the distance and loneliness. Not many couples, even married ones for that matter, can withstand years of utter separation. I guess, that’s how true love and commitment works—to transcend conventions and making the proverbial fairy tale into a concrete reality.

What I observed from their relationship is how they try to complement each other, if my brother is reading this he sure will give me smack on the head hehe…so I wouldn’t give in to details. However, they sure know how to balance their relationship and that’s how their marriage works.

On their eight year, they finally decided to get married and their wedding was the stuff dreams are made of. Everybody can feel their deep sense of love and it was no mistake that they were meant to be. By the way, they were both 33 at that time … it was indeed a loooong wait hehe!

Right after their wedding in December 2004, they went abroad to settle but knowing that my sister-in-law was pregnant, they finally decided that she was better off giving birth here than elsewhere. My brother, however, stayed in Dubai. I know it’s hard for him not be with his wife during the delivery but he never failed to let my sister-in-law knows that they are his world and life. And they still are…

Nine months after being married, they welcome Lorraine Sophia. An angel in disguise, armed with an infectious smile.

Just barely three months after their child was born and inasmuch as it was painful for her, my sister-in-law must go back to Dubai to secure her visa or else it will be revoked. This was the hardest dilemma for them—to weave a better future for Iya, separation is necessary.

To you, Kuya Budz and Ate Luvs, I only wish you the best and may your prayers be answered. Just remember that in every sacrifice, an equal amount of triumph will also ensue.

To you my dear, Iya. May you realize someday the extent of their love to you.

********************

N.B: They are just one of the statistics and their sacrifices weren’t that common nowadays. The Filipino Diaspora is happening and will continue to happen if proper measures to secure the stability of our economy will not come into being. I am not going to bicker about the loopholes of our present system because apparently, it’s under our noses. Something is definitely wrong.

I hope that next time we will cast our votes, we should consider the people we are rooting for.

Good intentions are not enough…remember that they will be the one who will hold the rudder of this mighty ship we call The Philippines.

Diary of an Idle Mind

thursday 092806

I went to work during the scourging of the typhoon 'milenyo' which leaved the whole damn city out of power. Up until now, our place is in total blackout. Candle anyone (?)

Man, what a sight in watching the storm dance in its fury. From my desk, an arms length from the window, I could see the explosions and howling of the wind and water as if being played by God Himself.

For the first time in the history of this tower (pix on the left), the people were being evacuated on the ground floor lobby. You know why...the Tower was basically SWAYING! That's HOW strong the wind speed was. Ok, ok, we do know that the building was built to withstand super storm but the management cannot take that risk...and mind you, I was kicking my ass for coming to work.

During that time, prior to the evacuation, we were so nauseated to the point of vomiting. Our room was like a cruise cabin being tossed and frayed during a tropical storm. You can literally see empty chairs moving! Everybody was wide eyed in fear, realizing that we can be the 'headlines' of tomorrow’s news.

But praise God, at around 4PM, the storms fury subsided and our company, being the corporate badass, have no choice but to sent us back to continue our WORK! YEY [clap clap clap...sarcasm ensued]

friday 092906

No darn electricity.

Believe me, I questioned how the people in the 1800 live with just a candle to light up their night, circling to an open fire and watch tiny flickers of sooth waft in the air, blabbing on how the stupid mule cannot do the farm work, or how the pimple-faced Betsy annoy prepubescent John or how the rats populate the barn house...or...

Eek, I apologize for my wandering mind.

saturday 093006

Still, no darn electricity!

One of my officemates was robbed during that night and all her important stuff were taken [insert high end cellphone, credit card and the ATM card where our end of the month salary was being credited.]

How I hate these people who have no decency to work hard and resort instead to grabbing things...things that were produced with countless hours of HARD WORK. When caught, they justify how bad the situations were and that they are in dire need of cash. FUCK that. They are nothing but lazy bastards who want an instant dough at the expense of other people.

How I wish their testicles will be infested with throbbing warts!

sunday 100106

UGH… NO DARN ELECTRICITY...

Things to do:

1) Rant about electricity. MERALCO, where on earth are you!

2) Rant about… oh wait, I got NOTHING to do but to stare at the wall and replay in my mind the mindless conversation of Tom Cruise and Renee Zellwe…whatever...on how ‘they complete each other’ in the movie Jerry Maguire.

N.B. Don't get me wrong, I thank God that nothing bad happened to me or my fam. I only rant about minor inconveniences. Forgive the guy for being so petty :-)

Monday 100206

UPDATE: Yey, at 11 PM, we have lights again. It's true, you will never miss what you don't have...and apparently, Madame Electricity has been with me for sooo long that makes me miss her all the more.

Hope you guys have a great week ahead.

Enjoy the little blessings sprinkled along your way. Take note that its these little things we can't live without.

Be loved!